Gaps and neuro-possibility.

7 min read

 An exploration of the concept of the gap as a positive force - addresses neuroplasticity & the opportunities offered by the synaptic gap & the dualism common in responses to light & dark. Referencing Cohen, Drake, Lao Tze & others about the benefits of the gap and how it can provide insights and calm -  including a serene Hopkins poem.

Letting in the light

In ‘Anthem’ Leonard Cohen sings 'There is a crack..in everything - that's how the light gets in'. This blog is inspired by some musings made possible during a gap and a pause I took in the last two years.

Cohen spent time as a Buddhist monk and the wisdom he absorbed in that time often shines sagely in his songs and resonates with some profound lyrics. Our default position as sub species homo sapiens is that we respond to light and dark viscerally, as we are wired to do by our survival instincts. All our metaphors about them, good vs bad essentially, do tend to reflect a dualist bias.   

This pandemic provided most some interrupt or gap to our usual lives -  which gave many an unexpected pause to consider different options. About what's important mainly.

My moment

It's amazing that its nearly 2 years since I took a career break from my corporate IT existence, driven by a desire to spend time with my mother. I also wanted to explore my coaching and positive psychology potential - which I have started with Centifolia.

Dementia comes with a window or a trajectory - so it was important to me that I did not miss that window and let it slip by and live with regret.  Spending time with my mother and, in no small second way supporting my father whilst he tends her with the most exquisite care, has been something I will always be glad I had the opportunity to do.

Dementia has taught me my most profound lesson in mindfulness - how to be so purely aware of existing in just this, the present moment .

From what I have learned - and I share this as so important - present activities that stimulate the brain via music or craft or gardening are great but they require closer supervision than expected to support attention span. Most essentially one should never ask someone with dementia if they remember something - actually you should avoid all questions to reduce the stress caused by a blank memory fire. Instead you focus entirely on the present moment and discuss only the surroundings and their aspects that can be spoken about on equal terms. It takes practise and like in NLP clean language techniques such as a rigid use of the present tense is incredibly important.

Neurogenesis

Possibly my most favourite word and discovery about our brains. Neurogenesis is the process by which new neurons are formed in the brain. Neurogenesis is a key part of embryonic development and until recently, neuroscientists believed that the central nervous system, including the brain, was incapable of neurogenesis and unable to regenerate. However, stem cells were discovered in parts of the adult brain in the 1990s and adult neurogenesis is now accepted to be a normal process that occurs in the healthy brain. This is an exciting area of research but it is a very hopeful discovery. 

Sadly - not so positively - there is a lack of dementia support services in this country which I have found quite shocking given population demographics - it truly reflects a failure in social policy planning.  Whilst I have been grateful and impressed by all the care professionals we have encountered - the system of care is terribly underfunded and dysfunctional. I will continue to keep dementia and social care issues for the elderly as a key theme in my social media and fundraising focus. It is simply wrong that our vulnerable elders are not looked after properly and consistently.  There are gleams of light - this social enterprise is one of the most fun and positive ideas I have seen recently about dementia support . 

As time goes by and research continues I hope that there will be great progress in the way we view dementia, prevent it and support it.

The Gap Year

From the original gap year for students between school and university the idea of the gap has always appealed. Amongst the books I have read in the last year or so I found Raynor Winn's 'The Salt Path' and its follow-up 'The Wild Silence' particularly memorable. In a time of crisis her and her husband walk the South West Coastal path and it conveys a sense of space and no agenda. It is a powerful addition to the catalogue of books that explore the healing promoted by walking - in the best solvitur ambulando tradition.  

'The Wild Silence' is powerfully descriptive of how Winn was prompted to write her bestseller memoir about their transformative walk when her husband, Mole, started to forget the details of their journey. Writing was a way to stop moments - such as when Mole carried the tent from the tide and the taste of salted blackberries, from slipping away.  

Gaps might be pauses, breaks, spaces in the usual course of things - but there is usually something in them which involves a suspension of normal activites.

Yoga

In yoga you train to feel into the pain, to turn towards it and breathe into it and possibly release. Apart from yoga being an excellent way to build vagal tone, studies show that yoga was comparable to standard exercise therapy in relieving chronic low back pain alongside mood benefits.

As human beings we are wired to avoid pain of all kinds as it is a critical survival mechanism - the immediate sensory response to the hand in the fire an alarm from the brain. The brain does that SUPERLY loudly because its a basic protection mechanism and it is screaming for our attention.

Pain has a new definition from the IASP and it is: “An unpleasant sensory and emotional experience associated with, or resembling that associated with, actual or potential tissue damage.” The emotional aspects of pain have  an equal importance and that's essential to our understanding as we address fear responses and trauma - there is clear evidence and statistical studies showing a correlation between trauma and increased pain sensitivity.

In the Positive Intelligence program I am certifying in - Shirzad Chamine often refers to the hot stove. The natural reaction is to remove the hand in split seconds as the limbic system kicks in - but sometimes we keep our hands on that hot stove too long when it comes to behaviour patterns. Just thinking of that hot stove analogy when I am feeling overwhelmed by fears is an instant reset for me.

Troubles and pain are so intense in the moment that often it is only when we look back that we can see the lesson from the pain. In my case I have learned through yoga not to over-strain and do the vinyasas (movement sequences or flows) slowly and entirely at my pace on that given day.

The middle of difficulty

Einstein echoed the annoying life truth: "In the middle of difficulty lies opportunity." I got so sick of the corporate cliché that every challenge must be re-labelled an opportunity and being led along by it into some bad choices that I became very cynical about this concept.  

But if we go back to the yoga there is profound benefit to be found from observing the pain - and that extends to looking at issues more objectively - just letting them be and being aware.

There is a proverb that smooth seas do not skilful sailors make. It is our difficulties that teach us in life and leaning into any pain or issues can be insightful - we can increase our expertise by understanding more about constraints.

Flow

When we have the space and time to be ourselves in some kind of a imposed gap or space we can discover different options. Often there are choices we hadn’t thought about. In the Lightning Process this is the choice position between a pit of some sort or a life we love. In Positive Intelligence you can either convert or accept a gap or a situation that you perceive to be negative, which might be by doing micro reps (PQ reps) that get you out of your head and into your body. Or sometimes pure observation such as leaning into the pain in yoga might let you get out of the body and into a calm head space.

Neuroplasticity is the ability of the brain to change as it forms and reorganizes synaptic connections, especially in response to learning or experience or following injury. Its fundamental to our appreciation that we can change.

What is for sure is that the Lao Tze phrase has become a trusim: “If you do not change direction, you may end up where you are heading.” So I do encourage you to seek out pauses and gaps and create space for yourself - its essential in our busy lives. Meditation or exercise or creative play can all do the trick.

Personally - I am now starting a full-time management consultancy role after my extended gap and I am so enthusiastic about it - as well as more rested and wise after my break.

A favourite Hopkins poem to end with that is the ultimate in serenity:

Heaven-Haven

(A nun takes the veil)

I have desired to go

Where springs not fail,

To fields where flies no sharp and sided hail

And a few lilies blow.

And I have asked to be

Where no storms come,

Where the green swell is in the havens dumb,

And out of the swing of the sea.

Thanks so much for reading this blog.  

Love & light